And so it begins...

This blog is all about George, my dearest friend.

Due to his irrational fear of keyboards (both computer and musical) I have decided to take upon the task of keeping a diary of his life, that of which is orange and full of excitement.

For a man of small stature, he makes up for it in personality and uniqueness. He has green hair, a chubby physique, disproportianate thumbs, brown eyes, orange skin, green hair (have I mentionned that already?), an American Express card, and the brightest-white suit and bowler hat you have ever seen! Infact it is SO white, that Aquafresh have tried to steal strands from it to genetically enhance their toothpaste. Some bats even say that it makes snow look black.

George is also a riot at parties! He fills his pants with Fanta (orange, obviously) and expands all over the place. Everybody loves him, apart from Jeremy Potato, but we will get onto that later. He is also a woman-magnet as apparently his sideburns taste of liquorice and he has the forearms of a french arm-wrestler.

Last Wednesday is where it all began though, the life/birth of George.

George spent the first 16 years of his life collecting honey from furniture stores. Times were hard in those days, and it was the only sure-fire way he could help support his mother financially. In 1994, she died tragically of a rare colonic whooping cough. Distraught over his mother's death, George moved to Hawaii 3 years later in September 1992.

It was here that George attended Newton University and studied his Newt Physics degree. He completed the course with a 2:1, a monopoly "get out of jail" card, and a VIP pass to this years' Anual Golden Beef Awards ceremony (which is where I met George for the first time).